Opinions are all over the map when it comes to how much responsibility the “other woman” (or man) has for being in an affair. For essentially providing the outlet for the cheater to cheat. I’ll go on record as saying that I think the “other” woman or man has just as much responsibility as the cheater. There are always reasons and excuses and it’s easy to attempt a dodge in responsibility, but the fact of the matter is… if you know the person you are with is cheating on their significant other, then you are choosing to be with a cheater and essentially give them permission to do the exact same thing to you.
That being said, let’s assume that you are beginning to suspect that you may be the “other” and that is NOT ok with you… here are some rules of thumb for spotting a cheater: Continue reading
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, Dating
Tagged cheaters, friends, lies, life, love, marriage, men, relationships, the other woman, women
I came across an interesting TED talk today. In it, “Paradox of Choice” author Barry Schwartz talks about why our multitudinous plethora of choice is making us miserable. Of course, I immediately applied the concept to dating. Is it possible that we’ve raised our level of choice to the point that there is no way to be truly satisfied with the person we choose? Continue reading
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, Culture, Dating, Finding a Date, Humor, Keeping a Date, Online Dating
Tagged Barry Schwartz, choice, expectations, Jeans, life, love, online dating, relationship, satisfaction, TED (conference), The Paradox of Choice: Why More Is Less
Love, lust, infatuation, crush? What’s the difference…really? The media debates this love or lust story every day. From the 8 year relationship Waitie Katie endures to the latest of Hef’s blonde conquests… some may wonder, is it love or lust or perhaps a bit of both?
Granted, it’s all individual because who can really tell what’s in someone else’s heart? Maybe Hef really does love rather than lust after his latest blonde bombshell. That aside, I asked an expert for her opinion on how to tell if you’re in love or blinded by lust and she summed it up like this:
“Lust (or infatuation) is all about how YOU make ME feel. It’s inherently selfish in that its about getting instead of giving. Love is the opposite. It’s about giving instead of being focused on what you are getting.”
Do you agree?
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, Dating, Keeping a Date, Relationship Advice
Tagged giving, life, love, lust, marriage, relationship, relationships, romance
For most online dating sites, there are two predominant factors in how a potential dater perceives you. The pictures you post and what you write. If you are a complete novice or just scared of online dating, I posted an article on basic red flags and navigation tactics that you might want to check out. For everyone else, some quick tips on standing out from your competition… Continue reading
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, Dating, Finding a Date, Online Dating
Tagged life, love, online dating, online profile, Pictures, relationships, writing
Confusing, man-eating, delicate flowers… yes, I know. Navigating the world of women when you are firmly in the Y chromosome category pose challenges that test the courage of many a man-child. Some men are lucky/smart enough to get a gal pal or two to decode the mysteries. Some men cannily do the research… things like reading good blogs on dating and mating in America or even getting a dating coach. But some poor sods continue to mope over a beer with the guys and bewail recent blunders, innocent mistakes and in short, continuing to make the same mistake again and again. Attracting the crazies.
I decided to crack the door on Pandora’s Box here and give you some tips that may or may not help you navigate away from the man-eating crazy flowers and find a woman who makes your toes curl. In a good way. Continue reading
Posted in Advice for Guys, Breaking up, Dating, Finding a Date, Humor, Keeping a Date, Relationship Advice
Tagged attraction, communication, crazy, dating advice, dealbreakers, drama, first date, friends, honesty, Humor, inconsistent, life, love, lust, men, patterns, relationships, respect, women
We’ve all been there…the date where you just missed the cues… She wanted you to kiss her and you shook her hand instead. He wanted to be anywhere but there and you couldn’t stop telling that story about your grandmother’s teacup poodle. When you forget to pay attention to your audience… you run the risk of being “that” date living on your date’s oral tradition of crazy date stories.
How to avoid missing the details within the big picture? Pay attention to the non-verbal cues. She may say yes to date #2, but is she really going to answer your call? Continue reading
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, communication, Culture, Dating, Finding a Date
Tagged body language, dating advice, first date, life, love, non-verbal, relationships, tips
Let’s set the stage…you’re excited. You waited to kiss her until the 3rd date since you really really like her and wanted to build a little anticipation. After a great night of flirting, little touches, laughter and lingering glances into a very interested second party’s seductively soft green eyes, you quite simply can not WAIT to get to the evening’s finale. The big moment comes at the front door when she tilts her face up to yours… you lean in for the kiss and… Continue reading
Posted in Dating, Finding a Date, Humor, Keeping a Date, Personal
Tagged attraction, chemistry, Dating, dealbreakers, first date, kiss, kissers, kissing, life, love, lust, marriage, men, relationships, romance, women
My apologies to anyone who considers themselves “average.” Please know that I completely respect your goals and dreams in life…be they average or … well, ok, I admit it… I’m lying when I say that. I have a hard time respecting “average” as a life goal. Why?
I have an aversion to the word “average” being applied to people. (It’s similar to my abhorrence of the word “normal” but that is a completely different blog topic.) It baffled me the other day when a friend of mine said “I’m just an average guy looking for Continue reading
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, Culture, Dating, Finding a Date, Personal, Relationship Advice
Tagged average, Dating, excellence, goals, life, love, Oprah, relationships
“Closeness depends upon this rapidly disappearing phenomenon of undivided attention spread over time,” says Edward Hallowell, a psychiatrist and co-author of Married to Distraction. Just think how hard it is to complete a work project amid a stream of interruptions, he says.
“What you give up at work is depth. And what you give up in relationships is intimacy,” Hallowell says.
Hallowell advises clients to quash their Pavlovian response. Go to lunch, take in a nice dinner, and turn the BlackBerry off. Therapist Fritsch tells couples to show each other the same respect they’d give their boss. Continue reading
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, communication, Dating, Humor, Keeping a Date, Relationship Advice
Tagged Blackberry, intimacy, iphone, life, love, NPR, phone addiction, relationships, respect, technology
I read a great post today from a single dad blogger. Alternately cajoling, berating, encouraging and leading by example, Single Dad Laughing reminded men that they have a hand in the erosion of women’s body-image confidence. He points out that even the most self-confident of women can’t help but notice when her man “stops and looks” at another women. Whether magazine, movie or live action version… men look. Women notice. Continue reading
Posted in Advice for Guys, Culture, Dating, Keeping a Date, Relationship Advice
Tagged boobs, life, love, lust, men, ogle, pornography, romance, sex addiction, Single Dad Laughing, women