Truth time! If you are letting days and weeks go by between your contact and dates with each other… you are seriously at risk of hitting the “fizzle zone.”
Dates 1-3 are crucial for hitting a stride of 2+ times per week of contact and at least one date per week. If you let much more time slide in without a REALLY good excuse… think trip to remote exotic island with no internet or phone connection rather than big launch at work… the person in the other half of this equation is likely to move on or lose their shine for you.
I know that we all get busy and it’s easy to excuse why it took you 2 weeks to reply, but come on, we all know that when you’re interested… you find a way to connect. If you are trying to date someone who knows their worth and knows they are in high demand, you’ll likely never recover from a 2 week lag.
So keep the momentum going! How? Well… try this on for size…
- Gauge interest. Look at how long it takes the other person to respond and keep your pace accordingly. You really don’t want to be the guy or girl who becomes a “stalker.”
- This point is highly debated, but I’m all for short-cutting the email/textversations at the beginning of the relationship. Either pick up the phone or propose a face to face within two weeks of “meeting.” You just can’t get to know someone the way you need to thru email and text.
- Keep your missives to your time in person. Long emails with lots of information, with someone you don’t know, is a recipe for disaster. What you reveal in writing can ALWAYS find its way into the hands of someone untrustworthy. Don’t do it.
- If you make a date, keep it. I don’t know about you, but if someone flakes on me in the early stages… I take it as a precursor for how they will be long-term. Again — REALLY good excuses are acceptable here as long as you are properly apologetic.
- Long distance relationships can be a bit more tricky. If you’re facing one of these momentum challenges, check out this post for more tips and tricks at keeping it alive.
Courting someone is like a dance. If you get out of synch, it can be really hard to get back into step with each other. So, keep it moving!
