My favorite question to ask any happily coupled person? How did you meet?
Ever since the seeing the opening and closing montages in “When Harry Met Sally,” I’ve been fascinated by people’s love stories. And where better to start than at the very beginning? The fateful first meeting. Perhaps it’s the romantic in me who wants to know more about the endless possibilities of love or the practical single looking for new ways to meet my Mr. Right. Whatever the reason, the stories have just been getting better and better in the past few weeks.
From a man who fell for his wife through an online running club (and who still lights up when he talks about her) to an old friend of mine who feels blessed everyday to be loved by her husband… I’ve been hearing about the business end of cupid’s arrows.
I recently talked about not letting Hollywood’s version of romance get in the way of your real world love life, but even I’ll admit that I’ve been guilty of wanting a “good” story to tell. I’ve been on and off dating sites and while I scoff at the daters who lead their profile with a request to lie about how we met, I secretly completely understand how they feel. Perhaps we all have a little bit of Hollywood in the subconscious mix.
But the great thing about the stories I’ve been hearing recently? They are ALL magical moments… even if they seem, at first blush, to be kind of… well… mundane.”We met online.” “We met at a party.” “We met through a common interest.” Shrug. I mean, really, nothing too exciting going on there. But if I add their follow-up comments… ” She was the first and last girl I really prayed would write me back.” “He crossed a crowded room for me.” “I realized that I was living in the wrong state because I wasn’t living near her.” Well, now things get interesting. Same basic story… but the person telling it transformed a pedestrian first encounter into the beginnings of a beautiful romance.
The practical application: Honestly ask yourself if you’ve been hedging your chance at romance with preconceptions of what story you want to tell. So what if you meet on Match.com or at the fish counter in the grocery store? Perhaps the corner of 1st and Broadway will be the beginning of your love story. Who knows? But what I do know… your friends/family/kids/grandkids will care more about the sparkle in your eye when you talk about your significant other than the actual time and place of your first meeting.
You are the magic that makes the moment… not the other way around.
Too often we bind ourselves in perceptions that hold us back from getting the good things (or good people) in our lives. Yet relationships, since they involve two people are always going to be messy, bumpy, and unexpected.
When all is said and done, no one will care what held us back, only what we made of life when we came together.
Another great column.
great point GC… “When all is said and done, no one will care what held us back, only what we made of life when we came together.”
Hmm! Some insightful perspective. I guess the point is to be creative and open to potential situations, and to keep reaching out far and near in varied environments and settings. You just keep taking those steps and along the way you’ll make some great friends leading up to THE ONE! Great Post.
Thanks CE… eyes open! That’s the motto!
You are the magic that makes the moment… not the other way around. –> Brilliant. So true.
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