My big news? I am in the process of moving. Not just moving houses or neighborhoods, but states. I’m leaving the great state of Texas for my home state of California and now am pictured prominently under the dictionary definition of a “Damn Texifornian.” (What can a girl do? I like big, sunny states with interesting people and beau-hunky men.)
I’ve lived the nomadic life for the past year. On the road with two suitcases and 7 pairs of shoes. My dog joined me in September for a 3 month stint in Seattle (lovely) before driving down to San Francisco to find our new home all ready and waiting, complete with a crazy downstairs neighbor who makes a big deal out of things like us tiptoeing around shoeless and Dylan not doing his “jobbie” on “her” tree. Adjustments. It’s all in the adjustments. But crazy person aside, I love my new home in SF. I have a great flat-mate, live in the most beautiful place ever and am a whopping one and a half blocks from an off leash dog park. Life is good. And so is the dating.
But, reality had to come to roost at some point. Moving. As in the actual boxing, sorting, selling, packing kind. This is the week. I came back to Austin to pack up after my house spent a whopping 2 hours on the market before getting a full price, cash offer. The catch? In less than 30 days, I had to come home, move everything out and give notice to my darling cabana boy who’s been living here in order to scare off the squatters while I’ve played gypsy queen. A bit of an unexpected whirlwind in this market. Gotta love it when God makes the plan abundantly clear.
The neighbors all came by to start the gossip train yesterday afternoon when they saw my actual face in the front yard for more than a few minutes. I got questions about where I’m going and who’s moving in from the dog squad (a group of about 8 neighbors who walk their dogs together everyday at the same time.) They all hope that if she throws parties, her guests are as respectful and quiet as mine apparently were. 
(I think they must have missed the night I had an acoustic guitarist in the back yard or the time jello shots made it to the party and knocked one 6’4″ guy flat on his arse in under 30 minutes — he did make a fun photo-op.)
The long and short of it… I have great neighbors here. They are all at least 35 years my senior, but I served them well as the neighborhood entertainment and in turn, I knew I could trust them as my neighborhood watch. My mom swears that Mr. Cigar and Standard Poodle has a thing for me, and I won’t argue after having him crash my parties as a guest, but he’s a sweet old guy and Dylan liked his dog. I’ll miss them all.
So, this week, I’m up to my eyeballs in stuff. Random papers to sort through, old clothes to give away since it never reaches the furnace-like temperatures of Texas in San Francisco and memories. And oh man… memory lane. I forgot that it railroads through this house like a freight train to Georgia. At this very moment, I am taking a break from unloading the drawers. Why? Well, you see, it kind of slipped my mind that I never really threw away the memorabilia from past relationships. You see, I have a lot of space in this place and finding an empty drawer wasn’t really hard when the end of a relationship rolled around. So… a drawer here from the Jeff era and another drawer there from the Austin days (Yes, I dated an Austin in Austin. It was confusing for everyone.) Etcetera, etcetera and so forth. After uncovering the 4th unexpected sweet couple picture, I decided that a blog post was in order. (I’m beginning to think we take entirely too much photographic evidence of our dating lives these days…)
New dating rule: When breaking up, don’t just shove everything in a drawer. Either seal it up in a labelled box (if you’re a pack rat type) or toss that stuff out. One of my friends has a ceremonial burning party after she goes through a break-up. Now I know why. Getting whammied with love notes and “couple” pictures years after a relationship ceased to be a part of the present is just not fun. I can’t help but think this would be even worse if there was a Mr. Kelli having to sort through all of this stuff with me. Yuck.
So, later today, I’ll be tossing out re-homing lots and lots of memories. I don’t really see the point in keeping that old ticket stub or Valentine’s Day picture collage gift that was really very sweet when we were dating but is kind of obsolete now that he has a wife and kid #2 on the way. Since I’ve had recent proof that my exes are, in fact, reading this blog from time to time… if any of you want something you left with me… your limited retrieval window is now open until V-Day. I’ll be around and you know where I live. Or, at least, you DID know where I live.
That seems somehow appropriate. 
Enjoyed your post.
On relationship pass #1 with Michelle, I have her a gold pendant. When things ended poorly, she had it melted down and made into a ring.
On relationship pass #2 with Michelle, I gave her a diamond pendant (they’re much harder to melt down).
(that should have been “gave her” in line 2)
ugh… typoes
that would have been poetic if it had worked out — you could have put the diamond into a newly melted ring
Okay, gotta say it: Posts like this make me soooo glad I’m married. The days of breaking up and the awkward what’d'ya-with-her-stuff-now decisions are so history. You’re a wonderful writer and I find your blog highly entertaining and relatable to my previous life, but this one made my head hurt, not because of the way it was written (it was lovely and eloquent) but because I was painfully reminded about how glad I am those days are over for me. I hope I never have to endure them again.
Dear Kelli,
Congratulations on the new move. New places bring new energy with them and lots of new possibilities.
Thank you for the reminder to declutter. I moved down to Long Beach a year and half ago and I still have to go through stuff and get rid of things, reminders etc…that no longer serve a purpose in my life.
My desire is to finally connect with my soul mate but you can’t really do that if old memories and memorabilia from the past still haunt the present day.
May you have many blessings in your new life
.
Ivonne
Thanks Ivonne! I’m already feeling more clear after spending two days shredding old papers… but it’s been surprisingly hard to shred some of it. May need to call my girl squad into action
that’s hilarious …. both Jason’s comment about the “round 2″ gift of a diamond, and your comment that Ex’s could come get previous gifts if they wanted. ..
Love to see you this week. If I can help or hang out – contact me. -Ski.
If you want to dig thru years of old paperwork covered in dust and spiderwebs (garage)… definitely email me! LOL
Like you I grew up in California…. and now I’m livng in Austin. I miss the SF Bay Area and a part of me is green with envy. I’m sure your family is happy to have you back close. I really enjoy your blog.
thanks JMR! There are a LOT of Cali transplants here in Austin. Not that the Austinites are too happy about that — but they seemed to accept me anyway. *grin* I’m betting you love the insects of unusual size, pollens of unusual variety, feeling like you’ve been immersed in a kiln for 4 months every summer and no ocean. Other than that — Austin is a magical place.
Good luck with your move.
I’m one of the least sentimental people on the planet, so I’ve never held onto the ticket stubs, playbills, etc. And I’ve been known to mail recent gifts back to guys (ooh, cold).
Jewelry, on the other hand, I keep. My motto has always been – lose the jackass, keep the jewelry.
Thanks SG.
I used to be very sentimental. And then I became an adult who had to move those sentiments with her every few years. I am no longer quite so sentimental… hence the shredding party in Austin. That being said — it is nice that I’m not coming across old t-shirts, etc. since I’m pretty scrupulous about returning those within the course of a relationship. But gifts are gifts for a reason. I wouldn’t want someone to give back something I gave them, so I don’t try to give back meaningful gifts either. Diamonds are another story… I have yet to willingly accept one and have had to turn them down a time or two in the past.
Great Post…although we didn’t date long enough to accumulate much memorabilia….hope you anf the pets enjoy your new home in SF. MJW
MJW!
An entertaining Uchi dinner memory is a great accumulation in my book! How have you been?!
Dylan is the only one to make the journey with me to SF — the others decided to stay with their new owners here
Are you still in the same place?
K
Congrats on the move. Sounds like an exciting time for you. I’m going to have to follow this new rule, seeing that I live in a tiny apartment and all.
Amazing how cathartic it is on the other side of it all. Hopefully I won’t miss those pictures at some point. Now… what to do with the journals?!?!
Kelli,
I caught your blog last week and was disappointed to read that you were no longer going to be a fellow Austinite; Austin has become a little less interesting.
I would have written you a bit sooner, but this was actually the first real opportunity in a long time (competing with wedding plans, work issues, my business issues, etc) to just sit down for a time and write. I’m going to miss those Red Door Soiree invitations…..that I always seemed to be too busy to attend.
Best to you in your new adventure.
Eric
Eric!
How out of it am I? You’re getting married? Congrats!
Thanks for the note… I’ll certainly miss my Austin friends… and the Soirees *grin*
Best of luck in YOUR new adventure!
Kelli