You know what drives me nuts? Justifying obvious red flags because “chemistry” has turned your brain into cat food.
I know, I know… we ALL do it. Everything from ignoring that you’ve never actually spent time with the person when they are sober to the odd feeling that they aren’t *really* telling the truth about what they want in a relationship… it’s all been bypassed because “she’s hot” or “he’s a good kisser” or some other variation of “chemistry hijacked my brain and I’m along for the ride.”
Tagged brain, chemistry, dealbreakers, hot young thing, journal, life, men, patterns, relationships, women
Something most daters claim to find incredibly important, attitudes about travel can bring a couple closer together or smash a relationship to smithereens. I know guys who refuse to consider getting “serious” with a girl until they take a road trip together and girls who carefully watch just how well their man handles snafus on a trip. Some couples leave happy and come home broken up. For something that’s supposed to be fun, travel can really take it’s toll on a couple.
There are all kinds of trip planning services on the net, so I’ll skip that portion of things. This post is more about how to accommodate each other as a couple and get back in one piece emotionally. If you’re thinking that it’s time to vacation together, take a minute to read ahead and see what kind of traveller your partner tends to be…
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, communication, Dating, Relationship Advice
Tagged common ground, communication, couple, life, men, non-judgmental, patience, planning a trip, procrastinator, relationships, respect, Travel, trips, women
The question of the day from a reader: How long are you expected to stay loyal to a friend and not date their ex?
Interesting dilemma since both guy and girl code are pretty specific on this one point… Thou shalt NOT date a friend’s ex.
Notwithstanding the incestuous dating groups, most friendships have a hard time weathering the storm of when a current friend becomes interested in an old flame. Consequently, most of the people I know who value their friendships try to avoid the scenario all together. But what do you do when it seems that the statute of possession limitations has honestly run out and you think this guy or girl just might be your ideal drink of water?
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, Culture, Dating, Etiquette
Tagged communication, Dating, dating advice, friends, life, love, loyalty, men, relationships, respect, the ex, women
Being the communicator that I am, you may be tempted to think that I’m also a fan of getting the last word. But actually… nothing could be further from the truth.
The unfortunate side effect to being the “go to” girl on the dating subject? I hear a lot of stories about how people have already messed something up, but instead of realizing it… they’re patting themselves on the back for a job well done. Part of me wonders if I should tell them that their ship is already sinking because they took a shotgun and blew a hole in the bottom of their own boat.
By far the most prevalent gun used… the need to get the last word.
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, Breaking up, communication, Dating, Relationship Advice
Tagged communication, dating advice, gossip, last word, life, love, men, relationships, respect, revenge, rumors, women
“So, I got this INSANE email from some girl claiming to be his girlfriend on Facebook today…”
Raise your hand if you or a friend have started off a story like that since entering the world of social media. (OK, you can put your hand down now… your co-workers might be wondering…) A guy friend of mine recently told me about some girl who is mad at him for breaking up with her and is contacting every new person he “friends,” telling them that he’s a womanizer with herpes.
And lest you think it’s all crazy chicks, Continue reading
Posted in communication, Culture, Dating, Etiquette, Online Dating, Relationship Advice
Tagged Breaking up, cheating, communication, Culture, Dating, define the relationship, Facebook, friend, friends, life, love, men, myspace, online dating, public, relationship status, relationships, respect, social media, wall, women
We live in a fishbowl nation.
With the advent of social media and ease of information dissemination, all it takes is a comment, status update or text to seriously torpedo another person’s life. And many times, the commenter goes on their merry way… none the wiser for the detritus left in the wake of one, seemingly innocent, remark or photo. Is it any wonder that gossip continues to Continue reading
“They had such a cool way of looking at the world. I really admire that. Not sure they’re really my type, but I want to give them another chance. I think I could grow into being more attracted…”
“Yup, a hottie! Well, they did have this weird thing about the end of their nose and their toes were seriously jacked. They may be too smart for me. Now that I think about it, I’m not sure I want to go out with them again.”
Any question as to which statement was a guy and which was a girl? Continue reading
Posted in Dating, Finding a Date
Tagged attraction, chemistry, Dating, dating in the dark, first dates, life, men, patterns, red flag, women
I’ll admit it, I catch the new reality dating shows when I can find time to sweep through my DVR in-box. These past two weeks of TV have been a bit personally disturbing for one big reason… FOX’s latest Bachelor type spin-off, “More to Love.”
For those of you who missed it (or who use their ancient TV set as a planter/fish bowl,) I’ll recap:
More to Love: 1 husky, 26 year old who prefers “curvy” women + Emme to host + 2 confident and competitive plus sized women daters + 18 weepy, desperate “never been loved because I’m too fat” girls. Any one else think this is going to be a train wreck? Continue reading
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, Culture, Dating, Finding a Date, Humor, Keeping a Date
Tagged acceptance, Culture, curvy, Dating, life, love, men, More To Love, plus size, reality TV, relationships, respect, self esteem, women
For the creatives and scared to be creative among us, this video may be a huge encouragement. It’s about 20 minutes long, so you’ll need a lunch break or something to watch all of it, but her message urges the you to keep showing up whether your “genius” decides to inspire you or not.
As I was listening, it struck me that much of what she said can be pretty directly translated over to relationships. She mentioned the Norman Mailer quote: “Every one of my books has killed me a little more.” And it occurred to me that I’ve heard that exact sentiment about dating from Continue reading
Posted in Dating
Tagged advice, C.S. Lewis, creativity, Divine, Eat Pray Love, Elizabeth Gilbert, fear, God, gratitude, hurt, life, love, men, Norman Mailer, relationships, women
She locked eyes with him across a crowded room. They were both wearing red. As he approached, she noticed that he was drinking the same kind of beer. Out of a bottle, just like her! He approached with the perfect amount of a romantic eye linger and asked about… her baseball cap! Apparently he was also a Red Sox fan. In the same Boston bar after a series game! Who woulda thunk? As they swapped names and stories, she started adding it all up in her head… eyes + red + beer + bottle + Red Sox + unplanned meeting = instant destiny!
Smitten, she overlooked a few details Continue reading
Posted in Advice for Girls, Advice for Guys, Dating, Finding a Date
Tagged couples, destiny math, divine intervention, fate, life, love, magical thinking, Marie Clare, men, relationships, serendipity, similarities, women
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