Attitude is Everything

I’ve written about this before, but was so taken aback by someones positive attitude yesterday, that I thought the subject worth another post.

Yes, dating is a challenge and our American system for finding a mate seems to be a bit broken. This little corner of blog-dom attempts to combat that brokenness by bringing the positive, the hopeful, the loving, the respecting and playful back to light.  In the process of turning this all into a book, I’ve been meeting with a LOT of people up here in the fantastic city of Chicago. Everyone comes with a different history, experience and agenda. Some have had great experiences with very little negative, others have been kicked out of a guy’s apartment in the middle of the nite, in a bad hood, because she wouldn’t put out on the second date. And believe me, I understand that there is nothing more confusing, frustrating and complicated than the dating scene in America. But, I believe that attitude makes all the difference in the world.

My lunch yesterday, proved the case in point. A little background, he’s a 33 year old, two-time cancer survivor who turned that experience into a non-profit that connects cancer survivors with people who are currently going thru the treatment. (www.imermanangels.org) If anyone has a reason to be bitter with life, some might say he does. He’s been thru the wringer and thankfully made it out the other side. But as I asked him my series of questions about dating in Chicago, I got one positive answer after another. Even the questions designed to unearth the negative side of dating, he would simply look at me a bit blankly, turn it around to something positive and then charmingly apologize for not being able to answer my question… as he “just can’t think of anything bad to say.”

I’m not going to tell you his positivity has brought him the woman of his dreams (she may be right in front of him, but when you are building not only a business but a passion and a dream, there is less time than you would think to date. Which is why I wrote that how to date an entrepreneur article.) What his attitude has brought him, is something infinitely better… joy, peace and faith in humanity, life and the process. I have a feeling that when he turns his attention to dating, that person will be right there already.

Life can, at times, knock the wind out of us. Dating breaks hearts and shatters dreams day in and day out, but something to learn from someone who has been through a life threatening experience like cancer… its not really what happens to you, its how you handle it. Do you come out stronger and more full of hope and life than before, or do you let the disappointments of life take you down with them?